Wednesday, 10 April 2013

NEWS FLASH: Freyr being held captive!

Dear Readers, 

We have just received this important news Bulletin from the Franciscan Flyers of the Annulment concerning Freyr, one of our Witness contributors. It had been rumoured that he was on pilgrimage in Beyreuth for the Wagnerian Bi-Centenary. 

"Freyr is reportedly being held captive in a basement in an undisclosed location by a gang of yuppies.  He is tied in a chair, being fed tofu, and forced to watch David Suzuki commercials in an attempt to break his will. A rescue attempt will be made as soon as our advisory commission reports back on the legal liabilities".


Vox Cantoris said...

This is a tremendous likeness of the lost member of the team; are they using toothpicks to hold his eyes open whilst watching the Nonsaint Suzuki?

Barona said...

I am hoping that any attempt to rescue Freyr will be live-streamed on this venerable blog.