Monday, 22 April 2013

BREAKING NEWS: Freyr rescue to be live-streamed at 2 a.m.

Miss Jane Marple
As reported earlier, Freyr was being held by yuppies in an undisclosed location. Unnamed sources, for security reasons, have confided to us that the supply of tofu has run out and that a rescue operation will be conducted in the early hours of Tuesday morning. We are hoping to live-stream the operation. 

Our unnamed source has also informed us that the operation will be led by Miss Jane Marple. We cannot at this time inform you if she will lead an SAS squad or take action solely with the help of Inspector Craddock. 

Further information will be provided as it becomes available...

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